Tuesday, December 6, 2016

Sorry - Doughnuts Are Extra


As you may know, Mr. Trump has said that he wants to unite the country and bring us together.  

I thought this was just meaningless blather, but then I came across several ardent Trump supporters in the comments section of his Twitter account tweeting about how much they're enjoying these new mugs of theirs: 



I have to say, it was refreshing to see conservative men publicly bragging about how much they enjoyed swallowing the bodily fluids of people they didn't even know.   Given all that's been said and done this year, I would have guessed that they would have tried to screen out the tears of black people, or drawn a line at the tears of Muslims or of Hispanics or of the LGBTQ community - or at least put up a bit of a fuss about the tears of "nasty" women since swallowed tears inevitably mingle with the precious bodily fluids of the swallowers and become part of them - but no, they apparently make no distinction whatsoever.  It's as if we've finally found the one area of life in which they're willing to accept the contributions of everyone equally without regard to superficial differences!

This is such an unexpected sign of progress that I'm almost rendered speechless.  All I can find it within myself to say in response at this time is this:

Virtually all of the liberals I've known in my life have been kind and gentle people.  If there are any conservatives out there who remain thirsty after buying and using one of these cups, please let a liberal know.  There's a good chance that he or she will be happy to produce more bodily fluids for you to enjoy on the spot.  (Almost all of us are capable of producing several varieties, so feel free to ask for a different one if the first isn't quite to your taste.)

So, go on - don't be shy now.  Slurp up as much as you want.  If we run out rest assured that many of us will be happy to make more just to see the look of satisfaction on your face when you've finally had enough and are ready to move on to more refined pleasures.  

You know - like those associated with being a mature, rational adult in a free society that values logical discourse more than low, tribe vs. tribe ridicule.