My Newish Device

So, Microsoft is said to be hard at work on Windows 8 - an allegedly revolutionary step forward that will allow their operating system to operate on all kinds of devices and not just PCs.

Can anyone tell me if it will operate on my favorite new device?





I know it might not look newish but I can assure you that it's *quite* new to my home as of last month. It's called a Silvertone 8051 and although it was made and sold by Sears in 1948 rather than by Apple anytime this century, I challenge you to try to find anything made by Apple that will still work as well 63 years from today. Go on - just try. You can't do it, can you? Score one for Sears!

What's that, you say? You think the Silverstone in that photo actually died years ago? I suspected there might be doubters like you out there. That's why I've gone to the trouble to take this additional photo of it:





That's the front page of today's newspaper that it's holding up, my friend. What more do you need - the smell of burning flesh filling your nose as your fingers slip into its back side and make contact with its hot, glowing tubes? Don't be a sicko!

Now, I'll freely grant that my new device is not as easy to carry around as a smart phone or an iPad or even a laptop computer, BUT... I think my device produces more smiles per watt than just about any other item you might have on you right now.

For one thing, my device looks like it just popped out of a cartoon.

For another, it weighs an incredible 7 pounds. Carrying it around isn't simply an amusing diversion, it's a full body work-out!

Best of all, though, is the fact that all it does is allow me to listen to local AM radio stations. That's it! NO email. NO text messages. NO Google Earth or MapQuest or Wikipedia or YouTube. I can't even get any of those highly distracting FM radio stations you may have heard about.

At the moment, it's hard for me to imagine a more inefficient piece of equipment - and that's a good thing.

Efficiency is vastly overrated. It's what has led to the 24 hour news cycle, high unemployment, and Ebola's ability to get from Africa to Iowa in the time it takes me to find my shoes.

Economists might enjoy prattling on and on about the wonders of increased productivity but from where I sit (did I mention that my Silvertone makes a great emergency footstool?) the main thing increased productivity has achieved is speed up the rapidity at which wealth in this country is becoming concentrated in fewer and fewer pockets.

And to add insult to injury, all the big pocket manufacturers have either automated their factories or relocated them overseas.

Still not convinced that you'd be better off with a Silverstone radio than a PC?

Well, consider this: If you had a Silverstone radio right now instead of a PC, you might actually be whistling while you work instead of sitting there pointlessly wondering if I intended this blog entry to be funny or serious or merely annoying.

I rest my case.